How I kicked a bird (TIFU)

Today my post has nothing to do with my education but it is one of the craziest experiences I have had in recent memory. Here goes…

It’s about 3:00 in the afternoon. I am walking from my job at the financial services lab up to another useless meeting with the counseling center because… well i have no good reason but the meeting are required for all first semester students. As i am walking up the hill, I am doing my usual routine; listening to music and keeping to myself. As I make my way up the sidewalk, I look up from my phone and notice a bird walking around in the path infant of me. ***WARNING the next part of the story may be sensitive to some people.***

So I get the bright idea to wind up and pretend like I’m going to punt the bird into oblivion. I fully expect the bird will fly away well before my foot gets even close to it so really I am expecting to just kick the air. Anyways, I line myself up as if I am in a game of kickball and about to kick a home run with the bases loaded. I start towards the bird and as I approach it I wind my foot back. All of the sudden…

“THWACK!” I kick this bird right in its side and launch it into the sky. I must have kicked that bird better than I have kicked anything in my life. Had it not been able to fly, It still may have gone the same height. That’s how powerful this kick was. I Kicked a bird as if it was a playground ball at recess.

After the incident, I stood in complete shock. I couldn’t comprehend what had just occurred. I looked around and another guy, maybe a year or two older, had seen it as well. We made eye contact just to confirm what had happened was a real thing not some sort of delusion. Of course by the look in his eyes, and the look on mine, I could tell we were both in the same “bird-kicking” reality.

After I had a chance to calm myself down and reflect, I am still in shock. I feel awful for the poor bird and have no good reason why this occurred. Is it my fault for trying to kick a bird I assumed would fly away? Or is it the birds fault for being too blind to know I was getting ready to kick him? I don’t know the answer, I’m not sure I ever will. I can say this experience changed me, but I am not sure how just yet. I did learn one thing though, I will never try to kick a bird again because there is a small chance that bird wont get out of the way and I don’t want to be known as the “guy” who kicks birds.

This post is my apology to the bird, I am sorry I kicked you.


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